“Don’t you have a polythene lover to inflate?”

While this establishment grants a fair degree of latitude for drunken hijinks… sleazy behaviour is absolutely out of bounds.  This would include degenerate urges such as: sharking, grabbing, groping, leg humping;

…or any other form of sexual opportunism or harassment that springs to mind.  If you happen to be that way inclined, then perhaps make use of the free WiFi to order yourself a blow up doll, since social relations are clearly not your forte.

Should you encounter a creep, then please notify a member of our crew.  Here’s how they’ll handle it:

  1. If said person attempts to approach you again, then we’ll have our bouncer intervene, and caution them to keep their distance. If they fail to do so then we’ll immediately eject them.
  2. We’ll review the CCTV, and if there’s clear evidence of an assault then we’ll call the cops.
  3. In the absence of useable CCTV footage, then we’ll assign someone to discretely observe the individual in question, and should we witness them assaulting anyone, we’ll call the cops.
  4. If you’re prepared to make a formal complaint, then we’ll attempt to ID the individual in question, next time they approach the bar. Your details and statement will then be forwarded to the cops, along with a screen capture of your alleged assailant, and a clear shot of their ID. It could be that this person is already known to them.

Alternatively, if you’d rather our bouncer just issued the person with a stern warning, then we can do that instead.

For legal reasons we can only act where there’s clear evidence, where we witness an assault firsthand, or where someone is prepared to make a formal complaint.  Please also be aware that making unfounded allegations of sexual misconduct may constitute defamation per se, or lead to charges of perverting the course of justice.

Other than that, have yourselves a blast!

Concerned about gender bias, stereotyping etc? Please click here